Cinder-Amy

My life is such a clear illustration of Cinderella that even friends I have never told the analogy to can grant me new nicknames.

The day my mom stops criticizing me is the day that: pig's fly, hell freezes over, dinosaur's roam the Earth again, etc. etc. Please fill in your favorite ending. Since I am her offspring, technically, it's her fault. Sometimes I just wish she would get a clue and not see me as a terrible person. She's home early today because she has a doctor's appointment. Not one word about how the downstairs looks, which I spent the entire morning cleaning. The only thing she says is, oh we have to take that back (meaning the defunct filing cabinet to Target). Fine. Then she tells me that one of the girls from our Brownie troop got breast implants Friday and was in a car accident yesterday. I asked if the two events were related, she said no. Why do I care? Honestly! Then she starts to tell a story about something she heard on the radio this morning. She pauses for a long time. Then she says, Tom and Katie aren't getting married. I tell her, and here I thought it was going to be something of earth-shattering importance. She said, well ya never know. To play along with her game, I sadly added that internet reports are saying they're denying that rumor. Like I give a flying rat's ass about Tom and Katie. Had it been news about Johnny Depp, it would have been a different story. ;) Let's try to keep the priorities in order.

Enough bitching about that subject, let's move onto an easier target: Dick Cheney. He wins this week's biggest moron in Washington title. He is the first vice-president since Aaron Burr to shoot someone. And we all know how Burr's story ended. Wouldn't it be icing on the Bush administration if the man Cheney shot died? Think about it, he didn't have a permit to be hunting in the first place, he misused a firearm, and then he turned around and shot a gun in the vacinity of a 78-year-old man's upper body. No wonder the old dude had a flippin heartattack. This is who is in charge of our country when Georgie boy is unable? It is not very reassuring that a person in that position does not know how to properly obey the law and fire a gun. Although, I would hate to think what George would do in such a situtation. Gives me chills just thinking about it.

I'm going to go buy earplugs, a bullet proof vest, and stay calm until Team USA plays its first hockey game in Torino, even though I want Canada to win. It is WJBWD.